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Hello.

There are stories we tell to one-up each other, and then there is this blog. Read wondrous tales of strange creatures, explore the depths of human indecency, and hopefully laugh a little as we find out what could possibly make people do what they do.

Backing Down

Backing Down

May, what a month.

As far as fitness goals, this month put a literal strain on my back and I was forced to stop on May 24 due to back tightness. Now I know exactly how Ryan Braun feels when he’s on the DL. Not good.

Speaking of not feeling good, this writing is being done in Milwaukee the morning after my grandma passed away AND after rioting across the country. It’s just not a good time for … anything apparently.

January: 100 Squats

BEGINNING

SENSORY DEPRIVATION TANK

RESULTS

February: 100 Pushups

BREAKFAST WOES

OFFICE BREAKFAST WOES

March: 300 Jumping Jacks

JUMPIN’ JACK FLASH

NINE THOUSAND JUMPING JACKS

April: Ab Medley

ABYSMAL

Back to the workouts, May was a medley of back exercises that began with Supermans, reverse snow angels, Good Mornings and bridges. The reverse snow angles lasted about a week. I replaced them with a similar stretch that included taking a staff while in the Superman position and rowing it toward my lower chest. Like a Superman using a rolling pin.

I kept the good mornings and bridges, but added a few seconds of hold for every rep.

In Week 3, I added an oblique exercise my mom showed me how to do involving a crossed leg over the body and an upward crunch. I could tell it was effective, but ultimately short-lived due to the later discomfort. From my experience over the past month, I feel my tightness was more due to poor posture while working than the workouts themselves, but I’m not discounting that working out after a posture incident didn’t help.

Here’s the rub, I’m not sure what I’m going to do for June.

I’m still in Milwaukee with limit resources. I downloaded an app with some select workouts on a plan, and I can do my Spider-Man crunch or tricep dips from the original plan.

At this point, I’m not entirely sure where I should land.

I do have a weight update, though I’m uneasy with the results — 292. A number that reflects zero weight changes from early March while simultaneously shedding a coupe inches from my waistline and having shirts fit better. Could it be an unreliable scale? Unreliable shorts? The comfort eating over the weekend? Frankly, it’s anyone’s guess at this point.

My Best Booty

My Best Booty

An ABysmal April

An ABysmal April